Steve the Monkey & Piggy Wiggly Meet the Queen of Pain

Hi everyone! It's your substitute blogstress, Cass, checking in once again with another April update.

I am pleased to introduce Piggly Wiggly and Steve the Monkey, respectively, in the photo above. April's daughters insisted that they tag along so she would have company in Montreal. In turn, April loaned *them* her teddy bear, Virgil Exner - which seems only fair, really. :c)

April suggested the focus of this post be... pain. :(

She has had to endure a great deal of it in the past few days, I am afraid.

It comes in waves; it recedes somewhat after she is medicated, but returns yet again as they wear off.

Consequently, she has had very little sleep following her surgery. (I have the text messages in the middle of the night to prove it, alas.) And what sleep she can manage is fitful at best.

Her sense of humor is intact, fortunately, which is always a good sign. Several readers were concerned - quite rightly - about making her laugh unnecessarily. Needless to say, the instigator is - you guessed it - April!

I have mentioned that this may not be advisable... but the girl cannot help herself! Nonetheless, I shall try to refrain from following her lead. (Bad April! Bad April! lol)

She has said that the other girls there are wonderful, and they get along well. In fact, one went out for a walk and brought April back her beloved Doritos yesterday! I expressed awe - both that April can eat Doritos *and* that her roommate can venture outside so soon after her own surgery! Kudos to you both, ladies!

I will end with a self-portrait provided by our girl, taken yesterday:

"This is the only portrait *anyone* will have of me while I am here, Cass," she texted me. I must note that her fingers look quite fetching in spite of her fatigue, do they not? And that blue johnnie no doubt complements her blue eyes perfectly. Even in pain, she is hopelessly fashionable.

I will sign off for now. Here's wishing everyone in the States a Happy Fourth of July, and a Happy Thursday to everyone else!

Stay tuned for more!

***

Per April's request, a song from her favorite band, The Cramps:

The Day After :c)

Hi everyone, it's Cass again with another quick April update!

She had a difficult night, unfortunately. She was in a great deal of pain, and consequently was unable to sleep. 

We just chatted via text; she feels a bit better, but is still quite uncomfortable. Hopefully it will be short-lived.

In positive news... she took her first steps today! Yea!!! 

"Three laps around the room, sis!" she reported. I told her how proud I was of her... but she had fallen asleep again. :c) (I will forgive you, sis... *this* time. lol)

Her father stopped by today before departing for his return home. (Another friend is taking her home when she is discharged.) Once again I am so, so impressed with how wonderful he has been this entire journey. Why, I may even lop off one or two years of *my* Christmas list that they rightfully owe me, as their Irish-American daughter.

OK, probably not. But the fact that I was considering it speaks volumes. :c)

No doubt this is what everyone would expect from our April, but her sense of humor is intact, Here is one exchange from yesterday:

April: On waking after surgery I requested Doritos and Diet Pepsi... stat

Cass: And... ?

April: Received two saltines water.

Cass: Be sure to tell them you're never coming back.

April: I m sure they will lose a Michelin Guide star as a result of this.

Cass: No doubt. Logging on to Yelp right now to express my outrage on your behalf.

And one more from last night - this one a bit more adult (i.e. what constitutes 99% of our conversations). :c)

April: Hi sis. Waiting to get a shot. In considerable pain.

Cass: I'm sorry, sweetie. :c( Hope it is temporary. Please let me know when you feel better.

April: Will do. Remember that scene in Alien?

Cass: I was thinking of Scanners, but your reference also works.

April: Not my head that hurts, actually. lol

Cass: :D

April: APB - missing hot dog, short furry man, Identified by witness.

Cass: He goes by Dick. Dick Hertz.

And just in case we hadn't thoroughly revealed ourselves as the degenerates we both are, here is the video I promptly sent April... as soon as I finished laughing, that is. :c)

More updates and depravity to follow! Not necessarily in that order, of course... ;-P

Bonjour, Mademoiselle Avril!

She's out of surgery!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yea!!!!!!

She is very tired, but feels good.

Naturally, my priorities were in order.

First I said congratulations, and told her I loved her.

Then I started making fun of her. :c)

(Hey, she would do the same if the situation were reversed (someday, I hope!)) :c)

Here is a sample:

April: "Sorry. Hard to text with one hand."

Cass: "I am afraid to ask where the other hand is right now, to be honest."

April: Ha, Ha, ha. Smart ass. :-P

(For the record, she had no trouble firing off that last reply! lol)

I also sent her the following Far Side cartoons, based on seconds of careful research as to what they were doing while she was under:

And on that note, dear readers, I shall bid you adieu for now. On behalf of April, thank you for all of the warm thoughts and kind words!!!!

More details later tonight if April is up to it. :c)

Congratulations, sweetie!!!!!! Love you, girl!!!!!!!!! :c)

A Quick Day-Before Update

Hi everyone! It's Cass again. :c)

Just wanted to write a few words to keep you all up to date.

Before I get into today, I had to report a few details from April's adventures yesterday.

She did some last minute shopping, and went for lunch with her Dad.

"Sis, you won't believe where we ate," she texted me, sending along the following photo:

If you can't read that, it is called "Le Roi du Hot Dog." lol

Seeing that photo made me laugh out loud at the coffee shop where I read her post.

I immediately countered that *my* choice for pre-surgery nourishment would be here, at this legendary Seattle institution:

Again, for those who may not be able to see it, it is called Dick's. :c)

The sign below says "Dick's Deluxe 100% 1/4 Lb. Beef," which prompted me to muse that a quarter pound of Dick's beef might actually make a fine first meal post-surgery as well. And*that* made April laugh out loud!

***

As for the Day Before, April reports that she had a good day overall.

She spent the morning bopping around her room at the B&B to the sounds of the Ramones, and sent along this particularly lovely self-portrait:

I think that brilliant smile says it all, don't you think? :c)

Being April, she of course spent her big day in - where else? - a car. lol She and her father went for a drive in his Jaguar through Montreal "with the top down."

I asked if she meant the car, herself, or both ("just want to be clear for posterity's sake in the blog post, hon," I told her); she assured me it was the former.

"Otherwise, people would have been throwing money at me yelling 'for God's sake, get some boobs!'" she said.  lol

There was one glitch, unfortunately, shortly before she checked into the hospital.

Her MP3 player mysteriously deleted her files - 200 mp3s of her favorite songs and, even worse, photos of her daughters.

She was understandably distraught, as she was counting on both to help her through this week.

Fortunately, I was able to pass along several photos, including one of two stuffed animals her daughters loaned her for the week. (In turn, April's teddy bear, Virgil Exner, is at home with the girls to keep them company. :c))

We also managed to get April some of her missing songs that I also have - The Ramones, The Cramps, several others, including this gem from The Primitives, which April and I both adore:

I also sent along some live Bruce Springsteen, another favorite we both love. So at least she has some of her music back. :c)

***

The arrival of the replacement soundtrack helped, as did her ensuing report:

"You won't believe what the final supper was, sis: sausages! :O !"

You can't make this stuff up, folks!!!!

***

I just got off the phone with April a short while ago.

She is in good spirits - nervous, as we can all no doubt understand, but mostly very excited.

"It's impossible to put into words - 'surreal' comes closest," she said. "But that isn't quite it either. But I guess it will have to do."

She is in her hospital room and, is resting comfortably. She joked that the only reason she will worry tomorrow is if a) they ask her to hold open the textbook during surgery, or b) Dr. Nick from the Simpsons ("Any operation, $29.95") walks in to the operating room. :c)

She promised to either text or call as soon as she is feeling up to it tomorrow. And I, in turn, promise that I will let all of you know as soon as I can.

Please know that I have I passed along all of the greetings and expressions of good will to her, and told her that her considerable fan club down here in the States are all sending her wishes of good health.

She sends her love to all of us and said she is humbled by it. I assured her she deserves every bit of it, as well as the happiness she is feeling.

"Congratulations, sweetie," I told her as we signed off. "I'll talk to you on the flip side. And when we  do... you will have done it! Congratulations! I am so, so happy for you!"

I think she said thank you in return, but apparently I had the same dust in the air April did, which made it hard to hear or read the screen. :c)

Good night all!

Hugs,
Cass

Pilgrim's Progress

Hi everyone! This is Cass, substituting for everyone's favorite Blog Goddess, the divine Miss April. Some of you may know me from such blogs as Kelly's Quest (RIP) and, currently, Cassidy's Quest.

While I enjoy writing my blog, one of my proudest roles is as April's sister.

The fact that we were separated at birth by several months, the Atlantic Ocean, and, well, different birth parents does nothing to change the fact that we are, in fact, sisters.

Even if April thinks rock & roll ceased to exist after 1965 (The Cramps excepted) and that a shirtless Dick Cheney would make a fine Playgirl centerfold (no, I am not making that up!).

(On a related note, sis: Still following up with our folks down here in the States about the 29 years of Christmas and birthday presents that you quite rightly feel are your due. Stay tuned.)

Anyway, April wants to stay in touch with everyone while she is having her surgery in Montreal next week, even though she has limited access to the Internet during her stay.

This has has, alas, put the kibosh on her plans for live pay-per-view coverage of her surgery, complete with dancing hot dogs performing an interpretive dance chronicling her surgery as it happens. The world weeps.

(The dancing hot dogs are something of an inside joke between April and yours truly, one that has taken on a life of its own in our daily chats. April provided a possible alternate title for this post as well: "Dancing Hot Dogs Over Montreal...look to the skies." lol)

But fear not, brave readers! This momentous occasion shall still be chronicled with the reverence to which it is entitled, courtesy of April's first-hand missives. I will be posting her wit and wisdom as she parcels it out during the week to her millions of followers around the globe.

(Play along, ladies; the girl's gotta dream, after all...)

April is sending these to me via text, so they are brief by necessity. Any typos are my fault and mine alone, not April's. So without further ado, I will defer to the lady of the moment:

My sister April!



"The drive from Toronto to Montreal took all day as traffic was snarled through Toronto due to heavy rain.

My father offered to drive me down in his new supercharged Jaguar convertible.

My job was to stay awake and keep an eye out for police cars.

We stopped in Coburg for a late lunch and to check out a XJ8 sedan, as we are both inveterate petrol heads.

We made it to Montreal by ten PM, only to find most of downtown blocked off for a fireworks show in my honour. (Jazz fest on too; coincidence?).

As we decided to go down one day early, we are staying in a very quaint and French style hotel.

Today I check into the bed and breakfast associated with Dr Brassard's clinic.

Then, on Sunday, I transfer to the hospital. My father will stay on in Montreal till Tuesday.

So much more to say but I am somewhat constrained by the text format. I am sending my missives to my sister Cassidy by text, who has graciously offered to update my blog. (Ed. note: My pleasure, sweetie!!!)"

***

This is Cass again. April encouraged me to offer any additional thoughts I had, so I will share a few thoughts she passed along when we chatted late last night.

The commute through Toronto was nightmarish, as it turned out, due to horrendous traffic and heavy rain the entire journey. As she noted, she and her Dad stopped to look at an XJ8 sedan.

Because such things must be given their proper respect. :c)

"Cass, it was triple black!" she said, bewildered, when I apparently failed to show the appropriate level of reverence.

(Me to April: "Oh, it was *triple black*!!!! Well, that makes all the difference in the *world*, doesn't it?!?" :-p)

BTW, that is *all* I remember of her lengthy list of the car's virtues. Oh well.

(Nobody mention to April that I told you this, or else she'll tell Dad on me. Thanks in advance...)

We just chatted via text a short while ago. She went out to do some last-minute clothes shopping - hey, it IS a Saturday in Montreal, after all - and run a few final errands. She is in good spirits, and VERY excited. Almost as excited as I am for her. Almost. :c)

I will post her further thoughts as the muse strikes her in the days to come. And I promise I will post about how she is doing as soon as I hear on Monday.

April sends her love to all of you, and I have assured her that it is returned many, many times over by all of us.

More to follow, but for now, this is Cass signing off on behalf of April!

Love ya, sweetie!!!

xoxoxo

Transsexual Continuum: Au revoir monsieur….Bonjour, mademoiselle…

My undergrad degree is in history, it was also my favourite subject as a child and the only one I excelled at. I love exploring the history of everything around me, my cars, the companies that produced them, technology, politics, music. 

I want to know the history of how things came to be as they are. I look at the world through the lens of history. I am baffled how other people can go through life not knowing the historical issues and facts that shape our day to day existence.

I see my existence as a citizen of the democratic west as a continuum that stretches back from the American Revolution to Great Britain to Rome and to Greece.

It is the same with being transsexual, I made it my business to find out all I could about those who went before, the  trailblazers without whom we would not have the map to find our way forward.

Frequent readers will recognize my fascination with Dr. Burou and the Parisian transsexual scene of the late fifties, early sixties. I have even had two articles published on the subject. His patients included my heroines, Coccinelle, Bambi and April Ashley.

When I travel to Montreal to receive surgery on July 1st, it is the technique pioneered by Dr. Burou in Casablanca that will be the basis of my SRS.  

In her autobiography April Ashley recounts how on the operating table as the anaesthetic kicked in Dr. Burou said,

"I must ask you again, any doubts...'
      'Do your finest work, Doctor.'
      Then they gave me the final jab.
      As I murmured, 'One ... two ... three . Dr Burou bent over and breathed, 'Au revoir, monsieur.' 

As I came round I was not aware of my body, which was immobilised by bandages. The first words were Dr Burou's: 'Bonjour, mademoiselle.'
      I heard myself, far off, saying, 'Was it successful?'
      'Indeed it was. I'm very proud of you.'
      Then I passed out with relief."

Au revoir monsieur….Bonjour, mademoiselle… words I will whisper to myself  on the first of the month.

Hugs,

April 

read all of Miss Ashley's autobiography here: http://www.antijen.org/Aprilv1/

Casablanca is that way monsieur...

Lincoln Assassination: Part 2 "The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated"

Tuesday morning I journeyed back to the accident reporting centre in Burlington to get my police report.

The service representative informed me that the Province's no fault law meant that I shouldn't even bother filling a report and that I would be out of pocket for any repairs.

As an aside when waiting for her to get to my report I saw her cross to other side of the office and speak to the two police officers on duty. Now I am not sure I heard correctly but the gist was that…. "she used to be a guy"

Clearly when calling up my driver's licence and personal details, the name change was evident. Topical as recent events and Mr. Snowden have shown we have no secrets from our governments. I don't believe my personal appearance gave me away as I have been asked about my husband more than a few times the over last month or two. However I found her comments (hello I can hear you across the room, bitch) rude and disrespectful.

Once I had the accident report it was automatically sent to my insurance company, my broker also took my details and was more optimistic this time saying there was a chance that my insurance company would go after the driver of the SUV as she was at fault. He also added that the staff of the reporting centre had no idea of how insurance law worked in Ontario.

Before the end of the day I had a call from my insurance company, Portage la Prairie Mutual (great name eh? sounds like it should be insuring old west gunslingers), yes they would fix my car at no cost to me and would I like a courtesy rental car too! 

I was so happy and relieved!

The next morning I was driving a nice black Chevy Impala (working AC…yahoo) to inspect my poor Lincoln at the body shop. Initially the independent appraiser wanted to right her off but once again my contact at  Portage la Prairie went to bat for me, telling me to send her a list of the cars upgrades so that they could establish a more reality value. 

There was one more hitch as the appraiser said the dent in the fender was not caused my the accident, claiming that only the SUV's trailer hitch made contact with my car. I was able to prove otherwise sending them a photo taken a week prior at a car show showing no dent and a photo of the SUV's rear bumper with green paint on it…..thank goodness for cell phone cameras.

I should get my Lincoln back Friday morning….yes the same day I leave for Montreal!!!

The suspension has already been repaired and everything checked out with a four wheel alignment. The rims were also checked to make sure they were still were true and rebalanced.

yeah its supposed to be straight

looks like both she and I will undergo our respective operations

I would love to have her completely repainted but a quote of $9,000.00 but paid to that idea. So the patina will stay for now, it does have it fans.

I will also be sure  to send a thank you letter to my broker and insurance company. 

see you tomorrow, hugs April