Sometimes it is the straw that breaks the camel's back. I think I have reached the point where I say I have had it.
But what can that mean, there is no going back, not that I would ever want or attempt to. The way forward seems not difficult but impossible sometimes. To be stuck in no man's land after so long a struggle is heartbreaking.
Bureaucratic road blocks, the difficulty in finding a job, too many carrots dangled in front of me maddeningly out of reach.
Perhaps I will feel differently tomorrow.
The following tracks are from Alex Chilton's 1979 album, Like Flies on Sherbert produced by the other worldly Jim Dickinson (I enjoy spinning the Jester's Cadillac Man in happier times) in Memphis. The music is both new and old, broken, disjointed and captivating. Long a favourite of mine, its confusion and anger mirrors my own feelings better than I could explain. Here are two tracks, I've Had It a cover of the old Bell Notes hit and the archaic No More the Moon Shines on Lorena:
I'm so sorry, hon. :c( Hang in there; it WILL get better! You're stronger than you know; you prove it every day.
ReplyDeleteI LOVE Big Star, and think Alex Chilton was a genius. I want to pick up Jim Dickinson's solo debut, Dixie Fried, which is supposed to be terrific. And of course he graced us with his son Luther, of North Mississippi All Stars and Black Crowes fame.
Meanwhile, here's a cool clip of Mr. Chilton from 1986-ish:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=105yeWrjoEc
Take care, April!
Hugs and love,
Cass
April,
ReplyDeleteChin up, eyes forward, back straight, mind clear, heart open, and keep the goal at the front. I had to wait and work for 11 years so you do what you have to do and you have been doing this the correct way based on how you have treated your family and gone about this.
It will happen.
Love
Liz
I really feel for you honey. It is hard enough doing what we are going through without additional problems like finding work. Don't give up, life has a habit of turning round for the better when you least expect it.
ReplyDeleteI know that for many this time of year is so hard, especially with some much going on in your life right now. Please don't give up hope - things can get better.
ReplyDeleteBecca