Long meeting this morning with lawyer as part of "J's" and my mediated settlement. Both of us were emotionally drained after the session, sorry no gory details to impart but we did do lunch afterwards. And neither poisoned the other….though I do admit to feeling a little woozy after my first Big Mac in many moons.
It was very emotional, it finally sinking in that we are separated, that the relationship and marriage is over. Of course it was done almost four years ago but this felt like Lee at Appomattox….it was over!
We took separate cars and I parked the T-Bird on the street so I could leave a little later to pick up children from school. As I sat in the car listening to the ticking of the big block 460 cool in they winter air I noticed my reality challenged neighbour step out of his house and take a photo of me in my car.
No I was not illegally parked or blocking his driveway. Then he stands in his living room window video taping me sitting my car while I checked my phone messages. I did my best to ignore him though I really did want to confront him and his stalker behaviour.
His behaviour is really worrying me, I think he is one more incident from me calling the cops. After a trying morning this really put the icing on the cake.
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| sure its a cool car but why all the video attention |
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| oh yeah me!!!!!! |
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| back to factory wheels for winter |
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| yes that is an Abba 8 track cartridge! |
Hugs,
April
PS. thank to all who read or responded to my lonely post, your support means a lot
Hey there,
ReplyDeleteSo sorry, sweetie. That sounds like a trying day all around. This crazy neighbor is WAY over the line; I don't blame you for being worried. PLEASE be careful!
Hope tomorrow is better...
Hugs,
Cass
Wow, sorry to hear of the trouble...neighbors can be nice, or nasty. I've seen both...
ReplyDeleteAnd while I haven't read all your back posts yet...this type of action and irrationality sounds more than a bit familiar. If the neighbor is elderly, it could be Alzheimer's.
An elderly family member was acting irrationally toward others in her condo, and it kept getting worse and worse, involving others and us. It included major verbal confrontations, much like you've experienced.
She kept calling the police on everyone, who she "thought she saw" running around her house at night, and other completely irrational (paranoid) things, that were very hurtful to those involved. She even called the police once about neighborhood boys climbing the trees with wire cutters, who allegedly cut her power lines. The police pointed out that she has underground utilities so it was totally impossible...but she knew what she saw, regardless of the facts.
The police "had her number" and provided family their thoughts on a possible cause...Alzheimer's. To make a long story short, within a very few weeks she fell, alone in her own house, and hurt herself, requiring emergency treatment at the hospital (she was able to crawl to a phone she had left on the floor.)
On her fourth return visit in two days to have the splints and bandages replaced (she kept removing them due to their "discomfort"), she was admitted to the hospital. Her irrational and nasty behavior toward her own injuries and toward hospital staff resulted in further examination and a clinical diagnosis of Alzheimer's.
She never returned home. They stabilized her with medication, and the social worker got her admitted to a nursing home. From that point on she has resided there, in much more stable condition. Though she still has occasional troubles with other residents...
Not sure exactly how old your neighbor is, but that could be a part of his problem, especially if he is over 60.
Meanwhile, as Cassidy suggested, BE VERY CAREFUL around this individual, and totally avoid any confrontation. Just drive away, go inside, leave, make yourself scarce - whatever. You can't have a rational discussion with an irrational individual (whatever the cause of their irrationality).
Hope this is helpful...
Hugs,
Mandy
April, not sure why this guy needs another chance. Its likely that if he does something else it's going to upset you more than you are now. Surely a call to the police to register your concern is the right step. Seriously who takes pictures of their neighbour in the car?
ReplyDeleteI find myself at a cross roads about where I go next. Decisions to be taken that might cost my marriage. Do I feel I have a choice? No I don't and I know from your posts you didn't either. Doesn't stop the sadness but you will have some one to hold you in the future. Someone who will allow you to be yourself outside and in. I hope you can hold onto that thought as you move through this sad time.
I too agree that this is potentially a very bad situation. He is clearly fixated on you, and who knows what is going on in his mind.
ReplyDeleteIt was so good to see Spencer Tracey, as a one-armed war veteran, defeat the bully in the cafe at Black Rock. How nice it would be to do the same in our own real lives to all the people who lean on us! But it can't be done, not without awful consequences. And you don't want to end up in jail. Not in our circumstances.
Lucy
Hi April
ReplyDeleteI don't comment a lot but I always read your posts and think about you and hope that life will get better for you. Keep writing!
Louise
Thanks forr sharing this
ReplyDelete